Posts Tagged ‘makeup’

Not your momma’s Mary Kay

Monday, December 10th, 2012

What’s your earliest memory of Mary Kay makeup? Mine is of swiping some of my mom’s fancy creams and face washes. The bottle said something about reducing the signs of aging. Who wants to age? I was already seven years old. I figured I’d better get the party started. So I started using Mary Kay as a kid, and I have no conclusive evidence, but it might’ve worked, because people always think I’m younger than I am.

It’s been many years since I dipped into my mom’s sweet stash of Mary Kay. I hadn’t thought about it until I saw the BlogHer program. I was happy to take part in the review program because I have some good memories of the products and I was curious about how the Mary Kay of today compared with the Mary Kay of my childhood. I have no idea why, but I rarely blog about my beauty routines and obsessions. I’m pretty hard-core and have been for ages. I’m very particular about what I put on my face and I am extra loyal when I find something I like. I even have a Pinterest board dedicated to my favorites. I kept an open mind about Mary Kay and am happy with the results. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I am tossing aside a few of my staples for some of the products I tried.

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Fugly Shoes, Horny Makeup & Mr. Noodle: Things That Got My Goat This Week

Thursday, April 14th, 2011

I have really missed writing these posts. I find it hard to get riled up these days and am not too sure why. I suspect it is because I leave the house much less frequently now that I stay home with the kids but never fear my friends, with warmer weather comes more contact with the outside world and presumably a lot more goat getting.

Lelli Kelly Shoes

lelli kelly shoes

NeimanMarcus.com

Okay I know that I do not have the most feminine of tastes at times but seriously what the hell is going on here? These shoes are awful! Or maybe they aren’t? Maybe I am the problem. I have no idea but I can tell you that this is precisely the kind of thing that always scared me about having a daughter.

Some parents worry about teen pregnancy. I worry about my daughter wearing sandals that look like some sort of bedazzled fiesta unicorn excrement. No thank you. Is it me or are these $69.00 shoes hideous? I know for a fact that God will punish me and C will be begging for these as soon as she is able to crawl into Neiman Marcus but for now these shoes got my goat. Too fug for words.

Nars Makeup

nars super orgasm blush

Sephora.com

It all started with the Orgasm blush. The name wasn’t an issue since the color was so beautiful. As the years went by I grew more and more attached to the Nars brand but then I noticed something: dirty and filthy makeup names. Orgasm, Super Orgasm, Sex Appeal, and DEEP THROAT! Come one now I know that I am the coolest person on the planet (its true. My mom said so.) but I have zero interest in sounding like one of those Atlantic City HBO documentary hookers when I am at the makeup boutique.

Whatever happened to perfectly acceptable names like Georgia peach? or Ribbon candy? I don’t know. Something appropriate for an old lady like me. I am not a prude but this whole schtick is lame and played out. Cut it out Nars. Unless you are targeting Atlantic City hookers I would like a return to normal makeup names. Not that there is anything wrong with makeup for hookers but do hookers really spend $27 on blush? Seems like a waste since they work in the dark mostly but anyway I digress. Knock it off Nars!

Mr. Noodle

mr noodle

Muppet Wiki

I am sure that he is a perfectly nice man or clown or whatever he is supposed to be but would you let your kids hang out with this guy?

Could they make Mr. Noodle any more creepy? Is it the hair? The silence? The oversized clothing?

I have no idea but this is the exact kind of dude I was taught to avoid at the park.

Mr. Noodle always gets my goat.

 

 

 

 

What Got Your Goat this week?

CrunchyVTMommy

 

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